Leadership fails when listening becomes a performance

A few years ago, I consulted with a multinational retail company that had just completed an all-hands engagement survey. The results were alarming; employees felt unheard, unseen, and undervalued. Leadership responded swiftly. They hosted listening sessions, town halls, and anonymous feedback dropboxes. For a while, the staff buzzed with cautious optimism. Ideas poured in. Vulnerabilities were shared.

But six months later, nothing had changed. The open-floor workspace that employees said diminished productivity was still in place. The overloaded team members who pleaded for clearer priorities were still juggling conflicting tasks. And the promised leadership development programme? Still a PowerPoint draft.

Morale plummeted further, not because employees were ignored at first, but because they were heard and then dismissed. That is when one employee summed it up perfectly: “They opened the door, nodded, then shut it in our faces.”

“Listening is only half the equation of relational leadership. The other half, the one that either builds or breaks trust, is follow-through.”

Read also: The listening advantage: Why leaders who hear more lead better

Leaders today face no shortage of tools to gather feedback. From surveys and check-ins to Slack threads and “Ask Me Anything” sessions, organisations are wired to listen. But far fewer are structured to respond. And when listening becomes a ritual rather than a responsibility, it loses power. In fact, it backfires.

According to a 2024 report by Gallup, organisations that solicit feedback but fail to act on it experience a 32 percent drop in employee engagement, higher than those who never asked at all. The reason is simple: broken promises are louder than silent rooms.

People don’t leave because they weren’t heard. They leave because they were heard and nothing changed.

Let’s be honest: leaders don’t usually fail at listening because they are malicious. They fail because they don’t know what to do next, or they underestimate the cost of inaction. But trust is a currency built on small deposits of consistent action. One follow-through at a time.

Take the case of a global fintech startup in Berlin. After a round of layoffs, the CEO opened a confidential feedback channel. One common thread emerged: junior engineers felt overlooked and disoriented about their future. Within 30 days, the CEO launched a mentorship track, pairing senior engineers with juniors in biweekly virtual syncs.

Was it perfect? No. But it sent a signal: “We hear you, and we are moving.” Six months later, internal mobility went up 27%, and voluntary turnover decreased by nearly half. The message? Follow-through doesn’t require large-scale restructuring. It just requires believable, visible progress.

So, how can leaders avoid the trap of performative listening? It starts by recognising that every question creates an expectation. And every expectation creates a gap to be managed.

Read also: Leading by listening: How leaders can gain the competitive edge

Here are some powerful shifts leaders must make if they want to lead with follow-through:

From collection to commitment

Don’t just gather input. Decide in advance what you are willing and able to act on. Feedback should not be a fishing expedition. Make it clear what is on the table and what’s not. Transparency isn’t about saying “yes” to everything; it is about being honest about what is possible.

From communication to demonstration

After feedback is collected, follow up publicly. Share what was heard, what will be acted on, and what will not (and why). Then do what you said. One small change, implemented visibly, is worth more than ten ideas buried in a spreadsheet.

From overload to iteration

You don’t need to fix everything at once. Start with one commitment you can deliver on quickly. Then, iterate. Agile leaders know that momentum builds trust faster than perfection. Trust isn’t earned by doing everything. It is earned by doing something and doing it well.

Leaders should calendar accountability. Set recurring reminders to follow up on every major promise made to your team, big or small. Creating a visible “follow-through log” not only drives integrity but also shows your team that what matters to them hasn’t been forgotten. Consistency reinforces culture more than charisma.

The real cost of leadership is not in how much you know; it is in how much you own. Ownership isn’t just about making decisions; it is about making good on the ones you have already promised.

So here is a challenge for the week ahead: Revisit the last three promises you made to your team, verbally or silently. Which ones did you follow through on? Which ones are still dangling, quietly eroding trust one day at a time?

Read also: Leadership and the nuanced art of fairness

Because here is the truth: People don’t expect their leaders to have all the answers. But they do expect their leaders to have integrity, the kind that shows up in follow-through, not just good intentions.

The best leaders don’t just listen. They act. The best cultures are not built in conversations. They are built-in commitments kept. And when you choose to close the loop, when you match hearing with doing, you create something rare: credibility.

So follow through. Not because it is easy. But because it is the difference between being liked and being trusted.

Dear leader, in leadership, what you do after the meeting is what people remember the most.

About the author:

Dr Toye Sobande is a strategic leadership expert, executive coach, lawyer, public speaker, and trainer. He is the CEO of Stephens Leadership Consultancy LLC, a strategy and management consulting firm offering creative insight and solutions to businesses and leaders. Email: [email protected]